When I meet someone new and begin sharing stories of our lives, I always get reactions like "OH MY GOSH...YOU'VE DONE THAT, HAD THAT HAPPEN TO YOU, BEEN MARRIED HOW MANY TIMES??". I guess I give off the impression that I've never had anything traumatic happen to me. Maybe you should look a certain way if you've been married more than once or twice or heck three times. Or should treat people badly since I've been treated badly more than once. I don't fit any of those misconceptions.
I married my high school sweetheart three months after turning 18. I did this mainly because I wanted to move out of mom & dad's house and our parents thought it better to get married than to live together. I loved him dearly, but we had virtually NOTHING in common, he was a 70's-ish type party dude and I was a hmmm wallflower? That's how I always pictured myself. Someone that was just there with little to no use. Low self esteem is still something I struggle with.
Marriage # Uno lasted approximately 18 months. Our divorce was final a month before our 2nd anniversary. I messed with that poor guys head for nearly a year after the divorce was final. When I'd see or hear that he was seeing someone I'd call him crying on how much I missed him...he'd dump her and come running to my rescue and I'd think what the heck did I do that for? After about 4 times he quit taking my bait. He remarried about a year and a half later and has stayed with her for I guess 22 years now...wow.
The summer before I turned 21 I was raped by one of my best friends boyfriends. Our group of friends went on an annual canoe outing. This particular year I almost didn't go. I woke up running a slight fever and had a sore throat. But they pleaded with me to join them cause it wouldn't be the same if I didn't go. So I did.
It was a hot summer day, and all of us were drinking and having a good time. My friend's boyfriend was a flirt and this day he was hitting on me more than anyone else. But considering how crappy I was feeling I pretty much ignored it. I was passing him a beer from my canoe to his from a paddle and dropped it and he said you owe me a beer...haha Tension from my girlfriend was very obvious on our way home so I thought I would just walk from her house to mine since she seemed ticked at me cause her guy was flirting with me. I got about 4 blocks from her house when he drove up and offered me a ride. I said no thanks and continued my walk as he drove along side me. At this point I had no voice..just squeekin' when I'd talk, and was running a fever and feeling awful. He kept following me and saying I owed him a beer and I still had another 10 blocks or so to get to my house. SO dumb ass "never-want-to make-someone-mad" me gets in his car. He then heads in a different direction than where I lived saying I was going to buy him that beer. Whatever I thought. Then he pulled over and tried to kiss me, grabbing me saying he wished my friend was as "nice & thin" as I was. I punched him and told him he was mean and he continued his drive to the store. After a couple more stops trying to get me to cooperate with his demands we stop by a friend of his house in another city. I was feeling so ill at this point I thought I'd pass out from my sunburn, fever, chills, you name it. Then he comes out of his friends house and says come on the store is just down the street. And DUMB ASS ME follows him again. He said there was a short cut through a patch of woods and not thinking someone I knew would rape me I went along with him. He stopped and began kissing me again and I got mad and said STOP ALREADY OR I'M TELLING her, at which time he pushed to the ground held my arms over my head and raped me. He got off me, we walked the rest of the way to the store bought his beer and were walking back to his car when who came driving down the street...my friend. He cockily walks over to her and talks to her while I go to his car go get my stuff and get in her car. I was a mess with dirt ground in to my back and all she said did you do anything with him. And not wanting to hurt my friend for what "I" let happen I said no. I doubt she believed me, and I'm sure later on he told her it was a mutual "hook-up" because within a few months we were no longer friends.
I'll stop here because the next phase of my life was due to this incident and how I dealt with it or rather how I chose not to deal with it.
phew..I'm tired from writing and remembering all that!
. One of my favorite Keith Urban songs says it all for me. "Days go by, I can feel 'em flying, Like a hand out the window in the wind as the cars go by, It's all we've been given
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. They are the BEST and I will be a sad momma some day when they retire *(luckily they aren't very old so hopefully that won't be for a long long time). 
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. I hope all of you are enjoying this most precious of holiday's.
